So after Baguio (May 2), I went straight home to change and then went to a 12-hour shift duty. Came home at 7am (May 3) then took a 5-hour nap. Had a quick lunch, then start packing my things again as I am staying over at boyfriend’s place. He is leaving at 11 in the morning the next day (May 4).

I wanted so hard to cry that night. But I didn’t. I don’t want him to worry or to have a change of heart. So instead I put on a smile and made this last night another night to remember. I helped him packed his things up and iron the clothes he would be wearing on his flight. It was the polo I gave him on his birthday. He prepared a bowl of instant palabok (which recently has been our favorite), with boiled eggs, chicken dogs, and tokwa. This all happened at 12 in the morning. At past 1, we lie down on the bed he prepared in the living room. Hugged me so tight and whispered me how much we’re going to make this thing work. How much he love me. That night I felt calmed.

And so the day came…

This was our last picture together. I managed not to cry until I he entered that gate inside. When he was finally out of sight, it started to became real. Tears are starting to form but I fought it back. I don’t want to cry there. I don’t want his family to see my weakness, so instead I chatted with his mom until he texted that we can go home already. All tears came running down as soon as I got into my bedroom. I nonstop cried for i dont know how many hours until  he called via skype. I stopped for a while and then cry again. He tries to calm me down and after a while I did. I guess after that call I felt better. I still cry, but not as much anymore.

I know I will always miss him. I know this will be hard. But this is one thing I wanted so hard to fight for. I want us to win this. This our greatest test, and I am optimistic we will ace this. We’ll keep praying…. I love this man so much.